Johnny Mnemonic

May
19

Woot woot, my computer is back — and it works! Plus, as an added bonus, they gave me the broken cable they replaced. I have no idea why they do that (they did it when they replaced one of the speakers, too). On the one hand, it’s sort of interesting to see what was done. On the other hand, what they heck am I supposed to do with it?

Anyway, I’m happily computing away my Saturday afternoon, loading up my iPod with new and old music and watching Johnny Mnemonic on Space. I vaguely remember seeing it back when it was new, but I didn’t like it. Now, I’m really appreciating its kitschy 1990s view of what the near future would be like.

Things I love about the 21st century, as foreseen circa 1987-1997:

  • There are always fax machines.
  • AT&T makes all communications equipment.
  • All images on all displays are revealed using a wipe.
  • Displays arranged in portrait mode are very common.
  • All artificial intelligences will be female, tinted blue, and in desperate need of contrast adjustment.

In the event that you don’t actually want to subject yourself to this horrendous movie, you can glimpse a few of these stereotypes in AT&T’s*

(Yep, AT&T. It’s sort of ironic that they not only made every device in the future, but also made a lot of commercials about that very future. Hrm…)

awesome “You Will” series of commercials from 1994. There’s a montage of them on YouTube, and I love them. Best part? Tom Selleck*

(That’s right, Magnum-fucking-PI!!! How can you not love him?)

does the narration.

1:32 PM on Saturday, May 19th, 2007.

Comments

Dean

@ 3:15 pm on May 19th

And apparently, LCD displays just wont be as popular in the future. And I thought they were catching on

Ben

@ 9:32 pm on May 19th

"You also agree that you will not use these products for the development, design, manufacture or production of missiles, or nuclear, chemical or biological weapons."

What good is your Mac when you can’t even use it for the real reason you bought it?

Oh, also: SC2. Thoughts?

Steve

@ 9:09 pm on May 20th

SC2 can’t wait looks awesome. And they return the item because it costs companies money to dispose of garbage, but costs less to return it to you when they’re already sending something.

Mark

@ 10:29 pm on May 20th

Actually, I really wasn’t a fan of Starcraft. I’ll give the new one a spin, though, just to see if my tastes have changed.

Chris

@ 12:16 pm on May 21st

SC rox my world.

Crispin@Cheryl-s

@ 9:05 pm on May 21st

Ok Ok Here’s a question

Why don’t chicken breast have nipples??????

KEddy@home

@ 12:10 am on May 22nd

I dunno… we should channel that to Mark.

Mark@Work

@ 2:59 pm on May 23rd

Chickens aren’t mammals.

crispin@home

@ 8:30 pm on May 23rd

But they have feathers….

Comments are closed.